Still stuck on whether to send the apology or just let it go

I messed up big with my neighbor after my dog got loose and tore up their garden last spring. Part of me thinks sending a letter would just reopen old wounds, but the other part feels like I owe them that closure after I saw them replanting those rose bushes alone at 7am. Has anyone here actually sent an apology years later and had it go well?

3 comments

3 Comments

vera_johnson923d ago

Have you considered that sending that letter might actually help you more than it helps them? I gotta push back on this a little because I think you're overthinking it. If I was your neighbor and saw you watching me replant those roses at 7am, I'd probably wonder why you never just said sorry in the first place. That moment you saw them was a chance to walk over and have a real conversation face to face, not hide behind a letter. A note now feels like you're trying to offload your guilt without dealing with the awkwardness directly. Wouldn't it be braver to just knock on their door and say what you need to say in person?

murray.jana23d ago

I mean, I get what you're saying about the face to face thing, but idk if that's always the better move. Not everyone is great at handling confrontation in the moment, especially early in the morning when you're still half asleep. A letter gives the neighbor time to process their feelings without having to react on the spot. Maybe it's just me but I'd rather get a sincere note than have someone catch me off guard at 7am with an apology.

simonp7622d ago

Funny you mention that... I actually did something similar with my own neighbor a few years back. My dog got out and trampled their flower bed, and I was so flustered I just wrote a note and taped it to their door. They came over later that day and said they appreciated the note because they had a chance to cool off first. Not everyone handles surprises well at 7am, you know? Sometimes a note gives both sides room to breathe before hashing it out.