The 2 AM email from my sister made me rewrite my whole apology approach

For 6 years I kept every apology letter in a folder on my laptop, drafts I'd refine but never send. My sister finally called me out after reading one I accidentally left open, saying my letters sounded like legal briefs, not feelings. She pointed out I kept listing what I did wrong but never said what I wished had happened instead. That hit hard because she was right, I was using sorry like a shield to avoid actually being vulnerable. Now I write three sentences max, say the specific moment that still bugs me, and ask if we can talk. It's terrifying but my last two attempts actually got replies. Has anyone else had a blunt family member force them to change how they apologize?

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1 Comment

emmaclark4d ago

That folder thing is your real problem, you were writing to a judge instead of to her. Ditching the drafts and forcing yourself to say it face to face is the only way to stop treating apologies like homework.