Wrote my dad an apology in January and read it back in June, the difference in my handwriting threw me

Thea Torres · 2026-10-18T11:25:07.251643+00:00

I started writing an apology to my dad back in January, just to get it out of my head since I know I'll never mail it. I pulled the notebook back out last week and the change in my handwriting between page 1 and page 4 stopped me cold. In January the letters were cramped and slanted and I pressed so hard the pen went through in one spot near the bottom. By June it was loose and sloppy and some lines actually ran off the edge. I think what changed is that I stopped trying to make it sound right and just started saying the ugly parts, like the exact words I yelled at him on his porch in 2019. The first draft was me explaining myself. The later one was me admitting stuff I don't like about how I handled it. I also noticed I crossed out way less later on, which is weird because I figured writing the hard stuff would make it messier. Six months between pages and it's like a different person holding the pen. Curious if other people here reread their own letters later and see stuff like that, or if you write it once and leave it alone.

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Wrote my dad an apology in January and read it back in June, the difference in my handwriting threw me | Apology Letters Unsent - Thought Shares