Ran into my old neighbor at the grocery store and he straight up told me I was doing retirement wrong

I was grabbing coffee last Tuesday and bumped into Mr. Chen, my neighbor from like 10 years ago. He's 75 now and works part time at the hardware store, says he's happier than when he fully retired at 62. He told me 'you gotta have something to get up for, or your brain just rots in the sun.' That hit different because I've been counting down the days to stop working at 60, but now I'm wondering if I should plan a slow taper instead of going cold turkey. Been reading up on phased retirement options and talked to my boss about cutting to 4 days a week in a couple years. Has anyone else changed their mind about what retirement actually looks like after talking to someone older who lived through it?

3 comments

3 Comments

paige3311mo ago

Stumbled into a similar conversation with my retired uncle last summer. He mows lawns for free at the local park just to have a reason to leave the house. It made me realize how many people I know who treat retirement like a cliff they're going to jump off instead of a ramp they can walk down slowly. My dad's friend started a small side business fixing lawnmowers and now he's busier than when he had a real job. I guess what I'm getting at is that having something to do matters more than just having nothing to do, no matter how good that sounds at first.

danielnelson1mo ago

Hate to be that guy but I gotta push back a little on the cliff vs ramp thing. Retiring isnt really walking down a ramp slowly, its more like stepping off a moving walkway and suddenly your legs have to do all the work. You dont realize how much structure work gives you until its gone. My neighbor retired from the factory and spent six months just staring at the wall before he started volunteering at the library. The whole idea that you can just ease into it is a lie for most people because most jobs dont let you taper off. You either quit or get laid off and then youre just dropped into the void.

matthewdixon1mo ago

Man, that's a good point (and honestly, I get why people push back). I read something in a psychology article a few months back that said the average retiree loses about 40% of their social connections overnight when they leave a job, which tracks with your neighbor's story. You're right that most jobs don't let you fade out, so the "ramp" idea is nice in theory but falls apart when your boss hands you a cardboard box on a Friday.