That moment my sister asked to borrow $500 and I finally said no

I was standing in her kitchen in Phoenix last Tuesday when she started telling me about another 'emergency' and I just heard myself say 'I can't' for the first time. She hasn't spoken to me since, but honestly my bank account finally has a cushion and I don't miss the guilt trips.

3 comments

3 Comments

robin59121d ago

Used to be a total pushover with my own sister so I get how hard that first no is. Reading this made me realize that saying no doesn't make you a bad sibling, it means you finally respect yourself. Good for you for building that cushion, that peace of mind is worth way more than guilt trips from anyone.

oliverhernandez21d ago

What finally clicked for me was just saying "I can't do that right now" without giving a reason. My brother used to pick apart any excuse I gave, so I stopped giving them. It felt rude at first but after a few times he just stopped asking as much. The guilt fades faster than you'd think once you realize they're not entitled to your time or money.

vera_johnson919d ago

Set a hard boundary with mine a few years back. Started with "I have a budget now, sorry" and just stuck with it. They get mad but that's their problem, not yours. Save that cushion first, it protects you from their sob stories. Once you realize no explanation is actually required, it gets way easier.